goes down smooth...
Published on February 12, 2005 By philomedy In Current Events
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Alright. Here we go. Are you ready for this? First there was beer. Then there was non-alcoholic beer. Then there was light beer. Now there is (drumroll please) GAY BEER!!!

Yes, friends, someone has finally manufactured a beer with the specific intention of mass marketing to the gay community.

Let me just point out, first of all, that I think this concept is as asinine as saying some dresses, talks, or looks gay. That being said:

Do you hear it? Do you hear the activists getting up and organizing? Do you hear them marching to all corners of the globe to stop this pestilence from spreading? Do you hear them condemning this manufacturer to Hell? Do you hear it, brothers, Glory Hallelujah!

Do you hear the sigh of relief from groups that no longer have to go after cartoons, they can finally go after something important like gay beer? Do you hear them thanking the good Lord above for giving them an evil that comes out and advertises itself as gay so that they don't have to read homosexuality into a sponge?

Do you hear the panicked screams from millions of intolerant beer drinkers that can be fooled into thinking that now beer makes them gay?

Oh, I'm gonna have some fun with this.


Comments
on Feb 12, 2005
Wow...I imagine there will be alot of folks suckin' those down...
on Feb 12, 2005
homosexuality is the plague that needs to purge out from humanity
on Feb 12, 2005
Wow...I imagine there will be alot of folks suckin' those down...


I love you, shovelheat....hahahaha

Philomedy: Hehe...it's doubly bad...it's sinful alcohol...and it's for homosexuals...the horror!
on Feb 13, 2005
homosexuality is the plague that needs to purge out from humanity


I'd say you need to be purged from humanity, but I don't think you have any left in you.

Philomedy: Hehe...it's doubly bad...it's sinful alcohol...and it's for homosexuals...the horror!


Yeah, I don't know if I can ever enjoy Miller Time again.
on Feb 13, 2005
hmmmm i gotta catchy jingle tune goin round in my head but i cant conjure up a good rhyme for 'beer'. too bad near beer is already taken.
on Feb 13, 2005
Didn't SNL do this with Schmitt's Gay?

There's a lot of stuff marketed to homosexuals as one group among many, no doubting that. Pigeonholing *cough* a product is a poor business model, though, unless it is being sold for novelty's sake alone.

They'll sell more of this to people giving gag-gifts *big cough* than they will to gay beer drinkers, imho...
on Feb 13, 2005
They'll sell more of this to people giving gag-gifts *big cough* than they will to gay beer drinkers, imho...


Absolutely right. Although I hear there is a gay wine from Australia that has been going strong for a good while now.
on Feb 18, 2005
This is definitely stupid. It earns a high mark up there. It's like a whole new language. Next it's gonna be "no gay" signs on doors of stores, and "gays" are going to become a minority and offered jobs as bag boys/girls at supermarkets.