My earliest memories came from bad circumstances. My very first one was of me and my brother going back to brush our teeth when I was two and my mom lying on the floor. She had a seizure and died. I remember two guys in black checking her vitals and saying she was dead.

My sister doesn't remember anything before she was like six or seven, so yeah, some people block memories from the beginning.

Lovvens,
grins

I find this subject very interesting. I have a memory of being a very small baby, and my mother said I couldn't have been more than a year old. But it's not so much a memory as a mental picture. Freaked my mom out when I started describing stuff from when I was so young. But after that, I don't really remember anything else until I was older; I definitely remember stuff from when I was four, but might not remember much from when I was seven It's not all neat and tidy; it's certainly not consequetive.

Memory is a strange thing. It's much more flexible than we usually acknowledge. I have found, however, that once you remember one thing, more memories usually follow.

Oh, *grins wickedly*, that's horrible. I'm so sorry for you.

some people block memories from the beginning.

This is very true. My mother didn't remember her own traumatic childhood until she was nearly forty (and in therapy). Which is not to say that this is the only reason we don't remember things. At least I don't think so.

*grins*, i'm sorry. I can't imagine what that must have been like.

The subject is an interesting one, I think mostly because it brings up the question of when one begins to live. Clearly, I was physically cognizant from the moment I was born, but just being aware doesn't mean "I" was aware. I don't know that I'm me because I look in the mirror, but because of a feeling or intuition that I cannot describe. If I didn't have that intuition from birth, was I really me back then?

I am often surprised by the fact that I can barely remember any of my life until I am about fifteen. I know what happened. I have intellectual memory, but I have no mental images or concept of having been there for my own childhood (which raises an interesting point for yopur question about the self: maybe I wasn't there, or maybe we have a series of souls and I've changed souls now). I'm not sure if this is because I had so many bad experiences as a child or not, but there you go.

I too have memories going back to before I was even one year old. I remember lying in a bassinette, looking up at my Mum's Dad, who died just before I turned one. I have memories of the petrol station my parents managed and the house we lived in next door to it. I spoke to my mother about this and like Hamster, freaked her out when I started describing the house, and other details. At first she kept saying it wasn't possible that I remembered but then admitted I must have some memories as the details were far too accurate. Incidentally, with all these memories, I have a feeling of contentment and happiness.

I don't remember much from before I was 6, or even 8, either. Some people have a better memory, I suppose. I have friends who tell me they remember this and that, and I keep thinking how. I have trouble remembering things from when I was in elementary school, high school, and even last week, but since I was that young.

People are often startled to hear me describe something that happened around me and how I was feeling when I was extremely young--particular my older brother, who is only three years older (I'm 21 now). I often associate memories not just with images, sounds, and smells, but also with emotions. I remember one New Years--I was either 4 or 5-- I asked my mother when the year that was passing would come around again. Puzzled, she laughed and told me that it wouldn't--that it just keeps going. I remember it so clearly because I was shocked because I had assumed that time was cyclical. In my mind, my question was not unlike asking what time the sun would rise. Eleven years later, while researching various creation narratives, it all came back as I read up on Brahma.

Other early crystal clear memories are very uneventful in general. When I was five, my family visited my dad's old college roommate. When meeting me, he proceeded to ask me a series of stupid "what's your favorite...?" questions, including my favorite color and number. I had heard the color question before, but the number question was perhaps the most idiotic I had ever heard. I answered "five." He leaned in closer.
"Why five?"
"Because I'm five. When I'm six, it will be six."
Everyone laughed, including me. After that, I had the impression that he was an idiot. Later in life, I learned that he had a top position in an internationally successful investment firm. Guess he liked numbers.



"Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?"

Sorry for the hijacking. To answer your question, the earliest memory that I can summon without an external reminder would be when I was a toddler...half-crawling, half-running. Although I have selective memory with certain associations, I definitely still have gut-reactions to different things (as general and narrow as the word allows) that have had any sort of minute impact in developing my perspective on anything and everything. Even if I cannot consciously remember a specific time and place, some part of me will still react based on a different time and place that shares something in common from my perspective with the first--whether it's associated with the senses or with a mood/feeling/tone that comes along with being in solitude or through interpersonal interactions (intuition, I suppose).

I have a lot more thoughts on the matter, but I'll post later when they are more organized than this.